Akatsuki death funny version
by Natara1997
Summary: How to kill the akatsuki  this is supposed to be funny PLEASE r&r   Pein, Konan, Kisame, Sasori, Deidara, Kakazu, Zetsu, Tobi, Hidan, and Itachi all die
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Akatsuki but if I did it would be too perverted. XD, I got this idea from my crazy weird friend ;) p.s. who wants to someday marry Hidan (LOL I hope it happens) and she wants to convert to Jashin.

Victim 1 Pein/Pain

Step 1: tell Tobi to give Pein a headache by talking too much

Step 2: tell Konan to give Pein pain killers (A.K.A. Advil or Tylenol)

Step 3: there you go Pein is dead (sorry pein fans I didn't want to kill him, but she **MADE** me do it *starts crying T_T*)

Victim 2 Konan

Step 1: get Konan to go origami like (all paper)

Step 2: stuff Konan into a paper shredder

Step 3: blind Itachi

Step 4: tell him that his brother is right in front of him

Step 5: get Itachi to use fireball jutsu to were Konan is shredded up

Step 6: watch her bur mwahahahahahahahahaha

Step 7: another one gone off the hit list

Victim 3: Kisame

Step 1: go deep sea diving and find a shark and kill it

Step 2: make shark fin soup using said dead shark

Step 3: make Kisame eat the shark fin soup

Step 4: tell him he just ate his mom

Step 5: watch him **SUFFER**

Step 6: tell him every time he eats he's eating another one of his family members (fishboy got fried LOL hahahahahahaha =3)

Victim 4: Sasori

Step 1: piss of Sasori

Step 2: accidently shove him into a wood chipper

Step 3: start a fire using the woodchips

Step 4: make smores while Kakazu does the happy face =) for saving money (another one bites the dust)

Victim 5: Deidara (Dei-Dei *fan girl scream* who I am hoping will one day become my brother)

Step 1: hide Deidara's clay **ALL OF IT****. /_\.**

Step 2: after hiding all of his clay give him TNT

Step 3: do not explain how to use TNT just

Step 4: tell him to light it and hold on

Step 5: back away slowly and say "your doing good Deidara"

_**BOOM **_(whoopdy doo Deidara's dead but at least it is funny)

Authors note

I will not put up the last 5 of the Akatsuki till I get at least 5 reviews

Tell me if you have any good ideas and whether or not you like the story

(Also I know I should work on my other story but I am having trouble getting into it)


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: We do NOT own NARUTO

Wow we didn't expect so many reviews so quickly =)

Victim 6: Tobi

Step 1: give Tobi too much candy

Step 2: tape an orange lollipop on one side of a canyon

Step 3: make Tobi get it without going around

And tada Tobi is…. alive

Step 1 redone: acquire a sub

Step 2 redone: tie Tobi to the sub

Step 3 redone: send the sub deep into the water with Tobi tied on

Finally Tobi is… still alive (geez what does it take to kill this dude)

Step 1 redone again: (that's it if we can't kill him we will get rid of him *epic* dun dun duuuuuun mwahahahaha) put Tobi in a space shuttle

Step 2 redone again: wait till it gets super far in space

Step 3 redone again: then blow it up

Finally Tobi is dead…. "Hi Deidara-sempai Tobi is a good boy"

(THAT'S IT I GIVE UP)

Victim 7: Kakazu

Step 1: Feed him poison to kill one of his hearts

Step 2: Get Hidan to stab his second heart

Step 3: Put a genjutsu on Kakazu to make him look like Sasuke and set Itachi after him

Step 4: Make him walk in the room he and Hidan share when Hidan is changing

Step 5: tie Kakazu up then burn all his money in front of him giving him a heart attack

(mwahahahaha)

Victim 8: Zetsu

Step 1: stop watering him

Step 2: lock him in a closet with no lights on

Step 3: make him into a wilted salad and eat

(Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Zetsu salad)

Victim 6 part 2: Tobi

Step 1: torture Tobi by causing all the candy in the world to blow up

Step 2: leave Tobi alone with a knife

Step 3: Come back 1 hour later to find he killed himself

(Willingly or not HA Tobi fails)

* * *

Sorry about the long wait we both had a writers block for this story and would love to hear any character you want killed and any ideas on how to kill that character or Itachi and Hidan.

my friends note: hahahaha hey guy's don't blame this on me, it's her fault *pointing finger* so ya love you all, please don't hurt me *pleading*


	3. Chapter 3

Victim 9: Itachi

Step 1: Drug Itachi and send him on a walk

Step 2: find Itachi and tie him up

Step 3: cover him in meat, meat sauce, barbeque sauce etc.

Step 4: Buy a boat (if you already have a boat just skip over this step)

Step 5: start sailing into the middle of an ocean with Itachi on board (still tied up) with extra gas to get back. (Or you're screwed)

Step 6: Drop Itachi still tied up and covered in meat and sauce in the ocean (give him something so he floats in the water and doesn't sink).

Step 7: watch him SUFFER while sharks eat him alive.

Mwhahahahahahahahaha

Victim 10: Hidan

Step 1: Take away all his Jashin items.

Step 2: Keep him tied up so he can't make any sacrifices to Jashin until his immortality is taken away.

Step 3: Tie his necklace in a noose around his neck and choke him slowly laughing as he gasps for air and the life leaves his eyes.

Mwhahahahahahahaha Hidan's dead

Well folks that's it, the Akatsuki are dead and Orochimaru is already dead (in our hearts.)

Sorry it took forever I couldn't figure out how to kill Itachi and Hidan, since me and my friend cosplay them. So tell me what you think and TheRealGoodyTwoShoes's review kinda got me off writing so I just uploaded what I had for chapter 2.


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